The Waffle Log Blog

Chicken & Waffle-wiches

Place: Daravara, Edmonton
Date: August 14th,  2015

Accompanied by her professional work day colleagues Dougie dared to order an intimidating sandwich at the chosen lunch out location. The ginormous Waffle Clubhouse from Daravara was a feat (and feast!) to behold. The size certainly made it a challenge to consume if one was to respect any semblance of decent table manners. So, “fuck it” Dougie thought, “I’m going in” and tackled this behemoth foregoing utensils and etiquette.

Cheddar cheese oozed from the inside of the waffle, a surprise to Dougie, a pleasant surprise. The waffle was golden in colour, fluffy and cheesy, had a nice crisp exterior, and was quite savory. Acknowledging that this “waffle-wich” was probably accurately served without syrup Dougie still longed for the touch of sweetness to accompany the mouth-watering meats: juicy chicken breast and thick smokey bacon.

It is important to note that this was Dougie’s first (official) chicken and waffles and the analog waffle log blog reads, “not comparable” to the traditional breakfast waffles. However, since the inception of the International Supreme Council of Waffles the chicken and waffles scene has exploded in Edmonton and abroad. So, the Council recognizes the chicken and waffles pairing to be judged among all other waffles.

Anyways, overall, it was an exciting waffle experience though the difficulty of navigating the waffle clubhouse into one’s mouth makes it a dicey decision to revisit. Unless you enjoy a challenge for lunch.

Not that this is relevant to the Waffle Log Blog, but, Daravara has the best french fries in town. I have no dedicated french fry blog but I feel confident in stating this. Fry Fans come at me.

Rating:

4/5

It’s A Cake Date

Place: Gama Cafe, Edmonton 
Date: April 28th, 2015

Picture a charming fantasy cafe, one that a child’s doll house might look like, plush velvet couches, pristine white furniture, and adorable treats on the menu.

Included on the menu are waffles. These waffles were very unique in their almost too-perfect gleam looking almost porcelain and fitting with the overall theme of this establishment, Veronica noted. She took a few slow and measured bites assessing this waffle because of it’s unusual appearance. This waffle was what Veronica would describe as “cakey”.

“Cakey” is not a quality that Veronica looks for in a waffle. Light, airy, crisp, and so forth are generally the qualities she seeks. It’s important to note that this dense waffle tasted quite good, sweet but not too sweet, and was served beautifully with plenty of butter, syrup, and a helping of whipped cream.

This waffle gets a nod for creativity and distinct style in a world of waffle homogeneity. Despite it’s one-of-a-kind qualities the rating that appears below is due to it’s consistency being less than desirable and lack of warm crispy outer waffle according to Veronica’s rubric. 

Rating:

2.5/5

Valkyrie Breakfast ECCC 2015

Place: The Bookstore Cafe, Seattle
Date: March 29th 2015

Fun Time Douglas was on her second annual (by the time you read this she will have returned from her fourth annual) trip to Seattle for the celebrated Emerald City Comic Con. This road trip is a must, in Fun Time Douglas’s opinion, for comic lovers as ECCC has a very excellent contingent of comic creators in attendance. Also, at this particular point in time Fun Time Douglas was a part-time employee at her local comic shop (LCS) and connected to a network of ladies and non-binaries who also worked in LCSs. This network is called, The Valkyries. It was at ECCC 2014 that this contingent of The Valkyries first met for breakfast to share a meal before the geek filled day started at the convention. Continuing the tradition The Valkyries met at The Bookstore Cafe, downtown Seattle, for breakfast on March 29th, 2015 and Fun Time Douglas ordered the waffle.

Overwhelmed with the excitement of seeing new and old online friends Fun Time Douglas did not take very good notes about this waffle. She wasn’t overwhelmed by the waffle itself, though it was a good vehicle for the toppings served. Notably, the strawberry rhubarb compote and real whipped cream toppings were a sweet and tart treat on the taste-buds. The cafe itself was charming with excellent staff accommodating our large reservation with grace and efficiency.

Fun Time Douglas enjoyed the waffle quite a lot but enjoyed the company of her cohorts most of all. The Bookstore Cafe’s breakfast was excellent fuel for a nerdtacular Saturday at Emerald City Comic Con. To learn more about The Valkyries, who they are, what they do, and more you can find them on social media on Facebook and Twitter. Fun Time Douglas highly recommends following them on Twitter for New Comic Book Day (#NCBD and #ValkRecs) updates and book suggestions! 

Rating:

3.5/5

Engineered To Near Perfection

Place: Buttermilk Fine Waffles, Calgary
October 12th, 2015 (and ongoing)

So, Fun Time Douglas (Dougie) visits Calgary frequently and needed to redeem the previous waffle experience in the city to the south (read at your own risk here). The Council also welcomes back the guest waffler, Even More Fun Time Douglas (a.k.a. Arelasaurus) for her comeback. This time Arel’s reconnaissance delved deeper in the Calgary’s waffle scene and she reviewed reviews and cross-examined recommendations. So, the sisters embarked to a new establishment called, Buttermilk Fine Waffles. On 17th Avenue the restaurant had a youthful appeal with a hip design, not exactly Dougie’s style as she leans towards the classic diner aesthetic, but Arelasaurus dug it. The service was cafeteria style so the Dougie-Duo sat at the bar to see the waffle action as it happened. Arel marvelled at the high tech orange juicing machine and Dougie made note that this establishment was solely dedicated to waffles. Noble, indeed.

Notably, Buttermilk has been the first restaurant with good coffee (special note: coffee was not had at Cha Island, so it’s exempt from this statement and besides Dougie has it on good authority that the coffee is excellent). The coffee comes from local Calgary coffee roasters Phil & Sebastian. Other important features are not just the waffle prep system, high tech waffle irons, and friendly staff but the real maple syrup and a revelation to Dougie, pre-melted butter. Genius.

Arel ordered the Ham Waffle served with ham, asiago cheese, grana padano, and green onion. Her main comment was, “the toasted cheese is DYNAMITE.”

Dougie ordered The Classic, of course. Served with the pre-melted butter and real maple syrup. What did she think about this hip new waffle? Well… The notes read:

“Evenly cooked and golden! Crispy outside! Fluffy inside! The pre-melted butter was an excellent bonus accompanied by the real maple syrup. It was a lovely balance of a slightly savory waffle with sweet syrupy goodness.” What else could be said about this waffle, it’s everything Dougie had been looking for. 

Ratings:

Fun Time Douglas: 4.9/5
Even More Fun Time Douglas: 4.75/5

Why a 4.9/5 and not a 5? That would mean subscribing to the value system that perfection is attainable, a state of unflawed completeness. There are certain implications of believing that the subjective can be perfect. After all, the subject of the waffle is indeed subjective.

Since the Dougie-Duo was sitting up at the waffle bar the owner of Buttermilk overheard Dougie’s enthusiastic praise and he shared some waffle secrets, which will not be uttered here. He’s running a great business down there at Buttermilk Fine Waffles with Movie Mondays and a modest collection of board games.

Perhaps needless to say at this point but Dougie visits Buttermilk Fine Waffles almost every time she visits Calgary, which, as it was mentioned already is quite frequently. In fact, during a summery June night of some serious karaoke Dougie discovered (after raving about waffles to her karaoke cohorts) that these pals also had a deep appreciation of waffles. And thus the Calgary Waffle Club was formed as an extension of the International Supreme Council of Waffles. It should be noted that the YYC Waffle Club does some serious research but we tend to convene at this favoured establishment for revelry and waffles.

The menu has a great selection of sweet and savoury options with a seasonal waffle adding variety making a trip to Buttermilk Fine Waffles an absolute treat. These waffles could not come more highly recommended.

Thanks for reading this slightly longer, but warranted, Waffle Log Blog post. See you on the flip side, wafflers!

Not So Trivial

Place: Smitty’s Gateway Blvd/Calgary Trail
I don’t remember but it was Shark Week 2015

Fun Time Douglas and Critical Bill set out on a more spontaneous waffle adventure and ended up at Smitty’s with what you could only call awkward décor with seemingly superfluous wooden beams and metal siding to create an effect? Dougie and Bill, with out intent, sat each facing appropriate televisions. Bill faced the Baseball game and Dougie faced Shark Week on the Discovery channel. Two waffles with two sides of bacon were ordered (what did you expect?) and the service was top-notch. Basically, the waffle itself was fine. As Dougie and Bill agreed, there was nothing wrong with it but also nothing great about it. It was the ultimate mediocre waffle. If you’re looking for your extra regular average waffle, check out Smitty’s. The council made a note; Bill was served a generous portion of bacon and Dougie was not.  She even remarked that she may have been jipped. Bacon jipped. Bill shared his bacon because despite his critical nature he is a pretty friendly fella. 

The highlight of Smitty’s was the bottle of Heinz Ketchup (this is not a product placement). The Ketchup bottle had a QR-Code that a smartphone could scan and it lead the user to a mobile game of Trivial Pursuit. Fun Time Douglas and Critical Bill love trivia. They agreed that they would play until they solved all six categories in a row. It did not take long between Bill’s knowledge of sports and Dougie’s knowledge of cartoons and their combined interest in history and geography. 

Ratings:
Fun Time Douglas: 2-2.5/5
Critical Bill: 3/5

Regular Joe? Regular Schmoe!

Place: Sweet Life Waffles & Crepes, Calgary AB
July 15th, 2015

Veronica visited her sister, Even More Fun Time Douglas (a.k.a Arelasaurus), in Calgary. Arelasaurus is a real solid big sister and she did waffle recon and based on proximity to her workplace and availability. She chose a place with “Waffle” in the name, “Sweet Life Waffles and Crepes”. The sisters embarked with enthusiasm because surely a place with waffle in the name means they are committed to the waffle and take it seriously? Not so! Veronica does not hold Arelasaurus responsible. Her recon was solid. The sisters ordered the “Regular Joe” waffle and the Council will let Veronica take it from here:

Warning! Explicit Content: extreme disappointment and strong language

“What the fuck man!? With waffle in the name there are certain simple expectations. This waffle was too soft, not even warm–let alone hot–when it was served, and there was no butter. No butter? No butter in the entire establishment?  Reheated but still cold waffle? A fucking faux pas. Even the bonus of real maple syrup couldn’t help this shitty waffle with crumbly texture.”

Arelasaurus’s note, “The bacon was excellent” and Veronica agreed, though bitterly and added, “Maybe the crepes are more their steez.”

Ratings:
Arelasaurus: 2/5
Veronica: a bitter 1/5

Business & Waffles

Lunch conferences are overcrowded, dinner meetings are a drag, but breakfast business, or business breakfast, is a delight.

Place: Artisan Resto-Café on Whyte Avenue
Fall 2015 

This meeting of the International Supreme Council of Waffles (ISCoW) was a multipurpose meeting so the notes are brief because Critical Bill and Dougie were met by the Admiral to speak on other business.

The Council also notes that the Admiral is an unexpectedly harsh judge of waffles though a very generous judge of character. Translating his review into a colloquialism you could say the waffles were not ‘the business’.

“Here’s the skinny,” Dougie reports, “A+, crisp and fluffy. An excellent delivery system.”

The Admiral: 3/5
Critical Bill: 4/5
Dougie: 4.5/5

Bringing Down the House of Pancakes

 

Place: IHOP, The International House of Pancakes, on Gateway Blvd/Calgary Trail
Summer 2015

The Council recognizes the guest Waffler: Pete the Patient Pirate. Bill and Veronica were joined by Pete to attend the International House of Pancakes after Google reconnaissance revealed that there was indeed a Belgian waffle on this pancake house menu.

Three coffees, three waffles, and the traditional side of bacon were ordered and the council began their noble task. On every table the International House of Pancakes provides a stainless steel carafe of coffee and four types of syrup; included are an old fashioned syrup, blueberry syrup, raspberry syrup, and a butter pecan syrup. Veronica utilized the four quadrants of the round waffle to sample each type of syrup with butter. Both Veronica and Bill noted that IHOP was stingy on the butter portions though Pete countered stating that it was a satisfactory helping of butter. Veronica was particularly critical of these waffles, more critical than Bill even. She reported that the blueberry and raspberry syrups were no good and too sickly sweet and the old-fashioned and butter pecan were O.K. She noted that the biggest failure of this waffle was that is was unevenly cooked. Critical Bill noted that the bacon was excellent value but the carafe supplied coffee was wildly over priced considering its stale drip coffee taste.

Ratings:

Critical Bill and Pete the Patient Pirate: 3.5/5
Veronica: 2/5

And now a message from Mitch Hedberg about pancakes:

The Admission of Reliability

Simplicity sticks.

Place: Albert’s on 99th Street (again)
When: Summer 2015

The International Supreme Council of Waffles (ISCoW) believes in the quest for the best waffle but as we are only human we acknowledge, for the love of waffles, that sometimes when the craving strikes it is best to satisfy the craving with a reliable source.

Sly and Bill returned to Albert’s on 99th in hope of recreating the simple golden crisp yet fluffy waffle they enjoyed before (with generous serving of bacon). However, Bill and Sly were left somewhat disappointed. The Council recognizes these collective comments, “the inside was soft, too moist.” An important lesson was gleaned; consistency is an essential attribute in the quest for the best waffle.

And Critical Bill made the closing remarks,

“why is the middle of my waffle so soft when the rest of my life is so hard.”

Rating:
Bill & Sly agreed: 3/5

An Endorsement & A Review from Guru Lou

A review to follow featuring DJ Guru Lou’s first appearance, but first, current affairs:

Dougie ended up at a show in a location that can best be described as a room resembling a basement from the 1970s. It was there that she ran into guest Waffler DJ Guru Lou.

cyqwznmvqaaykdu

“The Waffle Log Blog has inspired me to up my waffle game at home. I’ve just been using batter from a box.” said Guru Lou late on Saturday night. “It’s all about the butter and syrup.” Guru Lou added.

“The waffle is the vehicle.” Dougie nodded, sagely.

“Exactly,” Guru Lou said confidently and astutely added, “And, like, a Sunfire is a vehicle and a Ferrari is a vehicle. One is obviously better.”

DJ Guru Lou was one of the International Supreme Coucil of Waffle’s earliest adopter of the ISCoW’s standards and acute appreciation of the waffle’s delivery service. We are humbled that the Waffle Log Blog is inspiring higher standards and appreciation of the vehicle food.

The council thanks DJ Guru Lou (also read as: Bong Sample) for his musical contribution (read: granting Dougie permission to hijack the tracks) to the Waffle Log Blog Video (read: the video too long to actually watch) on the home page.

Place: Barb and Ernie’s, Edmonton AB
Wafflers: Fun Time Douglas, Critical Bill, Pete the Patient Pirate, and DJ Guru Lou
When: Summer of 2015

A long loved and lasting establishment in Edmonton, Barb and Ernie’s Old Country Inn was the destination and waffles the prize. The hospitality was supreme and service delightful, however, with only one in-house waffle iron the council put some strain on the kitchen. Without too much delay the council was feasting on beautifully topped waffles and accompanying sides.

Pete the Patient Pirate: Satisfied. The toppings of strawberries and whipped cream were delectable and the waffle had prime syrup soaking abilities. It was soft and squishy, and not too heavy.

DJ Guru Lou: It’s too big but nice and round. Easy 4/5 sans honeydew on the plate. Honeydew is bullshit.

Critical Bill: Soft in the middle. Could’ve been crispier.

Fun Time Douglas: Too soft, needed that extra crisp on the outside for a better syrup barrier. A bit unevenly cooked. Overall excellent balance of sweet and savoury flavour. Note: the atmosphere of this establishment is like the comfort of a Grandparent’s home, cozy as heck.

Unanimous four cheers for the bacon, A+ all around in that department.

Closing remarks from Guru Lou, “There are two Bus Drivers here. If it’s good enough for the Bus Drivers, it’s good enough for me.”

Ratings:

Pete the Patient Pirate: 4.7/5
DJ Guru Lou: 3.5/5
Critical Bill: 4.2/5
Fun Time Douglas: 3/5

Coming soon: the origin story of Pete the Patient Pirate!